Mourning, Silence, and Moving Ahead

I have been struggling lately. I have sat down to write often over the last few months and every time I do, I stare at a blank screen. This has happened when I try to write for this space, for my newsletter, and even for my books. My creative drive has been in a cave, replaced in my spirit by sadness, disappointment, and anger.

One of the booktubers I watch, Marines, posted a video recently on creating in difficult times.

I watched it at work and almost cried at my desk. Her words perfectly described the feelings that have been plaguing me. She used a particular word to describe the way she felt. Mourning.

That word snapped something into place for me. It’s not that the candidate that I liked best lost. That was disappointing. It’s that the candidate that won so obviously and literally detests and devalues who I am and who so many of my fellow Americans are as people, as human beings, that has wounded my heart.

It has been painful to realize that people I love, respect, and do life with think a man who sees women only as sexual objects, handicapped people as the butt of jokes, people of color as entities to be feared, and the poor to be crushed is a person who is morally fit for any job, let alone the presidency.

And so I mourn. I mourn what I thought I knew about people I loved. I mourn the loss of our compassion, empathy, and values. I mourn the fight we must now engage in and stay informed for. I mourn for all of us in this world we have created with our own fear, complacency, and privilege.

Mourning is a hard place in which to be creative. What little I muster, I have been funneling into getting Plagues of the Heart (Turning Creek 4) completed. I am happy to tell you that a release date is on the horizon.

If you, like me, have been in a period of mourning, it’s all right. Take your time. Just remember that there us a battle being fought and we need you when you are ready.

If you have read this and do not understand or you think I am overreacting, that is OK too. I ask that you look with compassion on those around you and react with love.

For my part, I will try to not let this space be silent. A new book is coming and there are many things to be thankful for and thankfulness is how we move past this place of mourning.

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