The Celery Stalks at Midnight

After much debate and gnashing of teeth, I have decided that the best way to get my faculty to respond to me is good old fashioned stalking. Therefore, for the next three or four days, I have going to lurk around the department at different hours to try to catch faculty in their native habitat.

–Jane, where is Bungalow Bill when you need him?

updated: link to book referenced in post title for the uninformed