Or
Why some Americans should have to take a test before leaving the country lest we let them out and other people become subjected to their idiocy
Overheard at Villa Caletas, Costa Rica while watching the sunset:
Woman 1 to couple next to her: We met some people from Cuba the other day. I did not think they were allowed to leave their country!
Later on in the conversation
Woman 1: Do they have lobsters down here?
Man 1 (her husband): Yeah, but they are only the ones with tails. They are not like the ones from Maine that have claws.
Seriously. This was not made up. The rest of their conversation was just as bad, but I had to stop listening for fear that my ears might explode.
So if you want a lobster with claws, be sure to get the Maine lobster. If the tails are what you like, Tico lobster will do.